I am a Koala Bear

You know, there’s an extremely crippling nature about writing:

Anyone has the capacity to write about anything they want, for any reason, claiming anything, at any moment.

For instance, I could wake up one morning, open up a fresh page on WordPress, and write a post about how I am a Koala Bear. I could write about my fur, my eating habits, my appearance, my “bear-ness,” and even describe the tree I live in.

So, what’s the problem?

I’m a human being. I ain’t no damn Koala (yo). 

Hence, the crippling nature of writing is exposed: It grants people the capacity to become completely delusional about  their daily endeavors. 

I’m not preaching about this phenomenon because I secretly believe that I am a Koala Bear; but, rather, I mean to draw a parallel to my life:

In a previous post, I said that I’d be starting my diet plan today, Wednesday, October 23rd, and that I would continue it for 28 straight days in order to form a new habit of eating. Now, being that this blog post is transmitted through cyberspace rather than by spoken word, my readers have no way of telling whether I stick to the plan or not. I could write post after post about how strictly i’m following my diet and working out; but for all they know, I could be eating SPAM straight out of the can as I type those very words (Just like readers would never know if a Koala Bear was writing this very post, as they can’t see me through the screen).

At this moment, I can guarantee that I am neither eating SPAM as I write this, nor am I a Koala Bear. However, the intent of this post is to show that words written mean NOTHING if they don’t translate into real life action. 

Anything we write matters only as much as it translates into the real world.

Think about it: Do you care about the actual digital forms that you fill out on Amazon.com? No, of course you don’t. You only care about the brand new pair of Ray Bans that show up on your doorstep 6-7 business days later.

The blinking cursor on any blank page holds the prospect of infinite amounts of content. You can say anything you want; but it doesn’t make it so.

Therefore, while my words on these posts affirm that I’ve begun my diet plan today, none of that matters unless i’m acting accordingly in the real, physical world.

So, to spare you all the prospect of me rambling on and on: I’m starting my plan today. I’m going to stick to it. And I ain’t no damn Koala Bear. 

Peace and Love,



28 Days

This week in training for work, I learned a lot about habits. More specifically, I learned what it takes to change a habit and have your new behavior stick.

All habits are the cause of triggers. Something happens that triggers your action, and then the outcome is a behavior. When this behavior happens subconsciously, it’s a habit.

Did you know that it takes at least 28 days of consecutive behavior to replace a certain habit? That’s right… You need to do something 28 days in a row for it to stick. So, for instance, if you wanted to start putting on your left sock before your right sock every morning, you would need to put on that left soc k first EVERY SINGLE DAY. If you put on the right sock first and don’t catch yourself, the 28 days starts over.

I’ve always found it extremely difficult to move into a life-changing situation. It’s not something that you can just snap your fingers and commit to. It’s a huge, huge commitment that you need to devote yourself to and make a steadfast, daily effort to execute actions that are aligned with your goals.

All of that said, how does it apply to me? The answer: Monday.

I need a few days to clear my mind, but on Monday, I’ll be starting back up on my Nutrisystem plan after an extremely liberal few weeks (more than a month) in which I was very uncommitted. That’s not to say i’m going to go crazy this weekend, but I want to start fresh in a fresh week.

By starting on October 22nd, that means that on November 16th, I need to be able to look back and say that I spent 28 consecutive days committing myself to this plan.

By putting dates to my actions and this commitment, I feel that it’ll make me more committed.



Returning from the Dead

It’s been way too long since I’ve written, and I borderline dislike myself for giving up on this blog.

The fact of the matter is, I caught a lot of shit from some of my friends for writing the blog. And, well, I realized that it shouldn’t be about what they think… nor should it be about publicizing my writing.

Those who stumble upon this blog will read it, and they’re entitled to their opinions at that point. However, by force-feeding my inner thoughts to the masses through social media, I feel like i’m setting myself up to come under criticism. Accordingly, i’ll no longer publicize my posts through social media.

Why do I write?

I love it. My mind is churning 24/7, and, well, some of those thoughts absolutely need to spill out of my head and onto the computer screen… it makes me feel more at peace, liberated… calm.

I know that I have an inherent flaw in my character in that I seek outward validation far too often. For instance, not only do I need to DO something, I need to have people notice it. The end game of this rant is the following: I hope to buck this trend and stop asking people to notice me.

Rather, I’d want to create, accomplish, and do things that people can’t help but to notice.   

In my opinion, that is the mark of someone truly great. 

With all of that said, I realize now how important this blog is to me. Not from the standpoint of what the words within my post say, but in the fact that it exists… its available to me at any moment of any day to release my thoughts and feelings. Whether someone reads my post or not– well, that’s irrelevant. However, the inner peace I feel after clicking “Publish Post,” now that’s what it’s all about.

To be frank, since I stopped writing, I haven’t felt as good about myself. I also haven’t stuck to my diet. 

Tonight, i’m leaving for Virginia to spend the weekend there… and then I have training for work on Monday and Tuesday. I’ll be back in the office Wednesday with no major vacations/trips/anything in my future. I see it as a time to cleanse my mind and body. So, i’ll say it to everyone who reads this… or no one, for that matter. The diet, and a road to a new me begins next Wednesday, and I want to write… religiously.

I’ve gone through a lot in the past week and its challenged my character. I’m not quite ready to fold just yet. I’m not ready to quit, and i’m not ready to sacrifice an inner peace and feeling of self-worth that I hold so dear.

I will reach my goals. I will carry on. And I will do things that inspire people to notice me, not things that people notice because I’m screaming at the top of my lungs about them.

As I said before, 

I want to stop asking for people to notice me. Rather, I’d want to create, accomplish, and do things that people can’t help but to notice.  

All of my love.